Alfonso's Demo CD (WARNING! this will make you cringe!)

OK so a guy at work has been slamming out these demo CD's of his "rap" and plans to take this as a full time career. (lol)

Now let me give a little background info on this dude before I let you listen to his... "rap"...

First I found out about this guy through my wife when he was working with her at the time that he had released this demo CD and I have heard nothing but negative reviews left and right coming from the lovely employees. They say and I quote, "Zach it's horrible..." or "He has no rhythm or timing what so ever." and "it's like basic rapping but at it's worse. It is seriously a sad peace.".

Now Alfonso has no car and no need for this job anymore and decides to leave his job to take his "rapping" career full time and yes he is very serious about it. So months later we find him working with me at my job and now his demo CD has made it all around my job with my fellow co-workers.

Now everyone that I work with has heard this CD before me and I've already heard about this CD long before he started working with me and well you can guess what people are saying about it...

"Dude it's so bad!", "It will make you laugh!", "You're not missing much..." and so on and so forth.

I just had to get my hands on this CD and I was so anxious to hear just how bad he was and I had to hear this for myself. The guy told me how recorded it and get this... He records his songs through a tape recorder, a cell phone and his laptop and the beats he found on Youtube.  On one song you can clearly hear that the song was not bought or made by him because you could constantly hear the creator play it's production logo over and over throughout the song.

He asked me if I wanted to buy a copy and I told him I would rather try it before I buy it and he said he has been getting nothing but positive feedback from people and truth be told they are all sadly lying to him to make him feel better because he is a nice guy and they don't want to hurt his feelings.

SO! Finally I received a copy of his work and I was so excited to hear just how bad it was that I immediately put it in the car CD player so I could listen to it on the way home from work and sadly it didn't play. I figured maybe it would play on my computer and when I brought it home, popped it into my computer I was sadly disappointed because there was nothing on it. A... Blank... CD...

Now before he gave me this CD I warned him I was harsh with my criticism and I wouldn't lie to him but shoot him straight and let him know my real personal opinion and if I found anything wrong with it I would make a list for him. I told him this because I make music too and yes I'm no professional nor do I plan to take my music seriously or full time because I know where my talents stand BUT I DO have an opinion and I DO know what to look for and what not to look for in music or rapping.

After I had received the blank CD I have never seen or heard from him again and just today I asked where he went and know one knows. Maybe what I said to him is why I got a blank CD and why I've never seen him again.

I guess i've scared him off... But anyways I finally found a copy of his working CD's in the break room and I have listened and laughed and cried and cringed.

I guess he is moving on to keep pursuing his "rapping" career.  I'm glad I sampled it before buying lol.

So without further delay please enjoy all sixteen songs.

Track 1
Track 2
Track 3
Track 4
Track 5
Track 6
Track 7
Track 8
Track 9
Track 10
Track 11
Track 12
Track 13
Track 14
Track 15
Track 16

Time to tell you what I think! HA HA!

I am going to make a list from A to Z or one through God knows how many numbers I will be adding of what I personally think about his "rap" songs.

1. Needs an original beat. (In other words please don't use other peoples creative work and if you do please buy it and if you steal it then make sure the song doesn't contain the Artist's production in it. where they repeat their production over and over again.)

2. There is no rhythm to your music. (Following the beat over and over again and is not what a rapper does when rapping. Think of your voice as a new instrument that incorporates a new sound to the music.)

3. Timing, timing, timing... (Your timing is waaaaay off especially is some parts where it's very noticeable. Take Track 3 for example...)

4. Find your rapping voice. (Using your real voice doesn't seem to be fitting your work and it is really off and it sounds like a white nerdy hick instead of a black guy.  if you're trying to portray a "Thug," You need to provide a thug approach. Come up with a new character with a different voice.)

5. Quality... (The quality was really bad and when I say that I mean it obviously sounds like you are recording all your music through your computer speakers and through a cheap microphone or your cellphone or a tape recorder. I know money can be an issue with most people these days and you need to make do with what you have, but there are a lot of free and very good programs out there that will record in better quality than that.

Find yourself a real microphone one that isn't cheap and one that has a better bit rate. Quality is important for audio work especially if you are considering on taking this professionally. In order to go pro you will need to buy pro software.)

6. Lyrics don't make since. (A song is supposed to tell a story weather it's a rap or not. Everyone tells a story in their work and there is no story in any of your songs whatsoever. All it is, is a collaboration of words mixed in with yeah and stutters to make yourself sound hard.)

7. Chorus. (A chorus in a song or in any song especially rap is very important and it's a great way to break the song and change up the harmony and your song through out different parts to keep it interesting and not stale and boring like I am listening to the same thing over and over again.)

8. Be original. (Don't try to sound like someone else and if you are using a beat that is already made then try to take that beat and make it sound original.)

9. Adding effects or intentional effects on your voice. (There were a lot of parts where I noticed you were trying to add in effects with your voice by making them yourself such as repeating one word over and over again. That is what recording and editing software is for.)

All in all if I had to rate your music I would rate it a one out of five and that's me being very generous and the only reason why I give it a one is because it made me laugh. That it...

I'm sorry to sound so cruel with my criticism but that how criticism works and if you don't listen to what people say or think or ask for the honest truth then you will never progress.

Trust me... I have had a lot of harsh and uplifting criticism in my time when submitting my Graphic novels off to publishers and I DO listen and read everything they say because they are right.

Do I think you will go pro? ... No...

Don't give up and don't get mad if this is a hobby you do enjoy.


SO what did you think about this? Did you like it or did you hate it?

Let me know by leaving a comment below.

Give a review.